Friday, April 26, 2013

Perfection is rare; so when is settling right?

It is so easy and quick to slip back into habits that stress rings the bell for. I have regained the 5 pounds I successfully lost and truly stabilized to as off after 6 months. And then there is the sharing of food or sharing over food that presents itself when you want to get out of a funk and you say, "Sure." which is not a whole hearted "Yes".  Losing my daily walks to a broken ankle did not help the cause but that is a crutch excuse and new Yogurt shops in town provide plausibly healthy sharing opportunities.

I know I am not at the place I expected to be but I am challenged to define what I expect. The words that do surface to describe the intangible are comfort and flexibility. But the reality is too much comfort food and paralyzing sense of unproductivity within the flexible hours.

But the biggest challenge is the loneliness. I think I imagined a collective of artists and thinkers and innovators to do out of the box, artsy projects that make a difference with.  I have had hints of this life along the way -- but the collectives are broken stories of people and time, the thinkers outpace my memory and talent and the innovators need day jobs, as do I.

I got some deciding to do.  But in my immediacy I have technology to untangle.

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