Wisdom Quotes - I Read Tea Tags

Oct 2009 revisited

What is it about October and being overcome by life? 

Mark Twain  is quoted on the teabag tag:

                                 The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself. 

This tag does not make it into my trash. I tell myself it is a reminder of my intent to visit Twain's CT home. But, it is more. 

Too often it is an outcome. A most genuine young person's  discomfort overcame him on Oct. 3rd, 2009.

A wise friend eulogized this life as --- an anomaly. 

He was genuine. Do not underestimate the interminable value of such a quality. It made his words drip with honesty, his gestures bleed sincerity, his compassion captivate with clarity, and his life – touch every person who found themselves fortunate enough to cross its path. He was a good man. Let me repeat this statement, for it seems to necessitate an extraordinary emphasis. He was a good man. In these lives we lead, such men are as rare to find as they are difficult to lose.

Being genuine is often a lonely road. I agree with this characterization. As hundreds of young acquaintances and some true friends mingled among disarmed friends-of-family to pay respects or say farewell... another anomaly played out and spoke to the dissonance that created such profound sadness and ultimately, loneliness. 

I am left to wonder if good humor was a mask on this soul, and sadness, the ultimate poison. Masks do more than hide. They reimagine. They cover up and that is not a road to healing.

The Christian burial of this non-believer provided a hyper-view of how anomalies of existence contributed to discomfort.

At the LGTB Rally [National Equality March] many lay claim to the temptation of life taking in the face failure to be accepted and the possibility of equality. To all those attending and knowing such a pain -- may they find strength in the self-knowing exemplified by Lt. Dan Choi. 

May those who feel the pain of distance from family for any reason - may you find a larger human family to connect every day - not just at this rally. 

I am grateful that a trip to the theater helped me know the story of Matt Shepard. I was encouraged as a mother on  10.08.09 that the nation was one step closer to being a better union thanks to a conference report in support of the Matthew Shepard Act before the Senate. Matthew Shepard was a gay student who was beaten to death in Wyoming in 1998. But it was a step, a legislative rider, limited to facilitating investigations of actual acts of violence, not threats of violence or other verbal conduct. Later the Hate Crimes Prevention Act of 2009 was passed

 ~~~ Back to Quotes At age 10, my life's goal was to have a published quote in Reader's Digest. 

In 2009, there were  4242 pages of RD (Reader's Digest Quotes) quotes online. They were categorized as Wit & Wisdom. Now Twitter-sized on-line world, everyone is self-published and searchable. Wisdom is metered out in blogs. It remains a habit, an immediate go-to to find the quotes when I come across an RD magazine.  And I am still in search of wisdom within from with my own experience.

a moment of exhilaration ..

countless hours of commitment remain to be served ... yet the glimmer of hope that maybe a greater purpose will someday be achieved seemed possible as I erected a sign with my life partner ... a sign that signals Special if Permitted.

As stewards of the community's home of free speech and the funds that enable this stewardship -- I remain passionate and well bruised.

More to come...

between the eyes_gun control

Poachers kill deer by shining light between their eyes; then shooting them between the eyes. In dear hunting 101 this is defined as shining and described as illegal. Deer hunters can be law-abiding, responsible citizens or poachers. The decision to poach is not made when the gun is purchased, it is made when a passion is activated that overcomes respect for laws natural and man-made. The decision to kill deer is made when the gun is purchased. Decisions and passions are always at play in determining the effects of guns.

Since the 5-4 Supreme Court ruling suggesting that there is a constitutional individual right for law abiding citizens to keep a loaded handgun at home for self-defense I have been in a dissonant limbo. I have been trying to discern how my experience can contribute to the discourse, what I truly believe about the Constitution, lessons of history, the value of discourse and the significance of grammar in the discernment of intent in authorship. Like the 27 words and 60 some amicus briefs the conclusions have not been matter of fact. However,facts have been substantive.

Starting with my shallows: I was relatively certain I believed in the idea of a living constitution, that the spirit of liberty guarantees discussion not rightness and history; it is essential to interpretive context. Exploring these assumptions I relearned that Jefferson felt the strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. That the Minutemen 'worldview' is a substantive context for interpretation of the Second Amendment but arms and the consequences of their proliferation have changed more than government. As a child I was inspired by Justice Holmes through stories heard while touring the homestead . There ideas were rooted like

we must interpret our Constitution "in the light of our whole experience and not merely in that of what was said a hundred years ago."

The ultimate good desired is better reached by free trade in ideas [and] the best test of truth is the power of the thought to get itself accepted in the competition of the market

I was reminded that DC voting rights have yet to be secured. Ironically, the right to handguns have now been. But the strongest lesson was the from the day in my VISTA service that I was to role-play Patty Hearst in a Police SWAT Training having my own American Experience. That day remains with me as does this understanding: the decision that you can kill is made the day you acquire a gun not the day you use it. Gun use is rarely rationale. And while the lives lost that touch my personal story are many and none have been by gun - all have been by passion.
So did I reach a conclusion: VT and DC represented the gun law extremes. Law-abiding people can disagree. And I will not knowingly befriend anyone who finds it necessary to own a handgun. Accidents happen. And today it is the dissent of Justice Breyer who argues for balancing public safety against individual rights that speaks truth to me, In my shallows I favored gun control in 1979. However, on S.W.A.T. Police Training Day it took only 4 hours to turn me into a killer of men. The solid grammar arguement aside:

One can, rationally, sensibly, logically read “shall not be infringed” as taking TWO, DISCRETE antecedents: (1) “A well regulated Militia being necessary” and (2) “the right of the people to keep and bear arms” — so that the amendment precludes infringement of TWO SEPARATE things (a) A well regulated militia and (b) “the right of the people to keep and bear arms.”Thanks Loup-bouc

The living constitution can change through interpretation. A living constitution will have well articulated dissent.

Lifelong…then retirement or into retirement

Life-long: what are the benchmarks? Is it duration or duration in relationship to the length of one's life. When must a lifelong relationship, idea, pursuit, regret begin to qualify? Is meaningfulness implied? What are the shades of meaning: continuous until a person's death, continuing through all or much of one's life? This out-of-place meandering began while at a retirement event of a co-worker.

When something is more than 50% of your life and the majority of your daylight it probably qualifies. Family relations most often do. A person’s work can qualify and sometimes that work is at one place of business. This is a phenomenon that is changing. It is one I never expected to be part of but one for which I can now claim a duration maker of more than half of my life.

For my co-worker the years are 36. The retirement is about to start with a summer vacation at the camp of his making with his best friend who is intended to be the rest of lifelong. He practiced retirement for a week before deciding that he was ready. Ready and able are not mutually exclusive but the able part usually comes far later than readiness for most (maybe I am projecting here). If employment is more than making a livable wage then one may never be ready. There are very few positions on 60 Minutes, or tenured professorships in the perfect climate, or artists that can sell enough to sustain daily bread or piano men or living poets with solid indirect income sources.

As I tried to kindle connections I found rhyming words: The batches of rhymes seem to speak to me about passionless day jobs: along phrases are scrape, rush, shove, stretch, play, pull, tag, or come along.

Lifelong is now a learning buzzword. It is something we are all expected to make claim to. I invested in this claim six years ago when I processed through a second graduate program. Sometimes I think it was only proof that I could type ever more poorly with more sleep deprivation. The brain exercise was sometimes fun and challenging enough to make me feel that I was evolving. However, I am not sure that the benchmarks for lifelong learning sited herein.(p.2) were achieved in my personal journey. I am often reminded of the three word marketing rule, as it is often deployed, and the challenges of good tauts. Grad school is where I learned I too could make hyper Connections like one of my most favorite books and made 4 television adventures by James Burke. (And I too have a box and scribble that may become bones or blog entries or remain for future ruminations.)

And then I get totally distracted in the world of connectivity and find bliss.

Purpose..all in a day's engagement

Today I got to speak with strangers, passionately about principles upon which this country was formed. No matter what the outcome of the vote on Tuesday, I can say today’s 1 on 1 time was well spent.
~~
I was at the parade in town today BUT I was not really there. I had a juggling challenge: To be respectful of those attending to honor the fallen with the opportunity to inform myself and the CB Team more about how the Community Access TV community building project resonates with residents.

The tone was random. Its details: 1 corner, 1 hour, 2 ½ volunteers (The 1/2 a penguin out of habitat.), a few revelations, several affirmations and perfect weather. The opportunity was both twisted with irony and suspended in time. Its true potential yet to be revealed and to be disclosed on Tuesday at the Town Council.

The memory evoked was ironic. In New Haven as LWV President @ 1986 I was host to CSPAN. CSPAN was new and covering local grassroots elections. Bill Dyson was running for State Representative for his 10th year. This was my 1st experience with cable TV, futuristic technology and local partnering. The LWV was still considered expert in debate format and trusted for its non-partisan approach to community engagement.

The debate moderator and my peer (a.k.a. new partner-Junior league leadership) handled things much differently than I would have. We were in a downtown church after several prep meetings. Then lights, camera action AND the satellite dish failed. A few minutes of technical check and we continue the LOCAL debate. It is approaching 9 PM and we are literally closing in on the end of the event. The moderator comments within range of a hot microphone. “I felt like an Oreo cookie middle’. So politically incorrect and so fortunately NOT on National TV, I was relieved. Today @2008 the high tech box had a battery which was inadvertently drained. At the last minute plans for a LIVE feed of the parade to TV and the Internet was short-circuited. Very few knew we failed to attain our objective. Similarly few knew we proved the capability on May 24th. The citizen producers on the other corner were most likely being politically incorrect in a fashion that has been known to remind me of the Oreo incident. And the future was being touched. Many will be changed in the future by what we were attempting to do today.

But that is history and my focus was the near future. I was trying to determine the best step forward into the future for the CB Team.

So what was revealed or affirmed by talking 1 on 1 with random people? Dan came closer to understanding my dedication to project (This is important because as a parent who chooses community involvement over family time it is essential that the child(ren) understands that it is not either or, it is all for them.) Dan apologized that we got a later start than planned. But 100 or 200 signatures is not substantively different. Actually, none of our informing the community 1x1 effort will matter if the vote is otherwise already cast.
~~

Dan charismatically got more than 100 signatures. He represented the ideals and the hope associated with the project. His commitment to democratic ideals and passion for justice were evident. I got about 40 signatures. But 40 out of 42 is good especially in a random interaction. I shared more details about the building, process and history. Dan stats were as good. Few shrugged us away. Fewer still said no if they agreed to be informed. People willing to listen was inspiring.

The basic concepts of the proposal: do not demolish the building. Use it for a community purpose. Price is not the driving factor from citizen perspective. Preserving history & free speech is good. Partnering is expected. ALL of this resonated with 99% of those approached.

Affirmed: Those aware of the issue based on newpaper coverage did not hesitate to sign a petition. Many wanted to know why the town was not giving us the building? Most wanted to know what the opposition position was? No one felt the building should be demolished IF there was a legitimate community alternative.

standing ... i should be standing

In the news today...i hope someone notices the cause...

Dad agreed to be the hump loan if needed..
We have a committee...
a challenge looms large....
Pulled off a TV show that I hope to see,,,someday....

garbled words...revise, revisit....breathe...

i am the rat in the race ,,,,being tested...

passion is still the primary ingredient...

So. Africa looms large in my future...what does this portend...

a moment ...